You.

With no introduction it was all apparent,
She was everything and more,
I awaited her arrival as if it’s been years since we last met,
Mere days became longer than I could ever anticipate,
Texts became calls,
Calls became visits,
It was more of a habit than anything,
Kinda like when a kid gets a new backpack,
I want to show all my friends,
But we all know what happens then,
I feel like I’m ten all over again,
The feelings are familiar,
But nothings the same,
Put U and I together,
The rest are just in the way,
You are my vowel,
And there’s not much I can complete without U,
No dictionary can define the way you’ve made me feel,
You architect,
Building me up just to break me down,
I may never know your blueprint,
But at least I was in your plans.



What Valentines Day means to me.

A day you would think would mean more to a woman, but I beg to differ. For its a day I anticipate every year whether I have someone to share it with or not. It’s an excuse for me to buy flowers, a day where I can put my masculinity aside and let my true feelings show without the fear of being called “sensitive”.  A day in which pulling out a chair or holding open a door wouldn’t be referred to as “thirsty”. Tho a woman who loves you would never say that, and will take every single gesture to heart, it’s the women who are materialized that have distracted men and other women from the true meaning of the day. 

To me, it’s the show and tell of “feelings”, not a day where the wanna-be Carrie Bradshaw’s of the world conspire and brag about what they have been gifted. But there is a challenge to this. When you’re a young man, you encounter many responsibilities and when you’re in love, that becomes a bit more difficult. You want the way you feel to translate into an action or a grand gesture. But when you harvest so much love for a person, you almost feel like you can’t afford to do that. You want to buy her hundreds of roses, or maybe take her to an island. Randomly fly to her city, put your hands over her eyes, and say “guess who?!”. But when you can’t do things like that, you begin to feel discouraged.

"Maybe I’m not good enough for her, she probably knows she deserves better". But what is better? A man who can buy her attention or a man who has earned it? Chemistry and general attraction can’t be bought, and love isn’t determined by one day and the lack of extravagance you currently cannot provide. Valentines day is not an evaluation. Don’t fall for the gimmick. Your anniversary is like the birthday of your relationship, valentines day should be a celebration. Two souls coming together is a beautiful thing, and it should be acknowledged naturally. 

I’m happy it’s Valentines Day, I’m looking forward to see hundreds of happy couples walk throughout the city with goofy smiles on their face. I know what it’s like, and if you don’t get ready, because someday you will. Nonetheless, enjoy your valentines day, you aren’t ever alone. Loving yourself comes first no matter what.

Girls Like You

You go after everything you want,
And you usually get it,
Don’t need a man for anything,
Except that one thing,
Brains for a scholarship,
Looks like a model,
Can drink all night and wake up with no problem,
Elegant and articulate,
Hood but classy,
When things don’t go your way,
You never lose your smile,
Positive yet realistic,
That’s what I like about you,
You taught me things I couldn’t learn myself,
I wouldn’t say you’re too good for me,
Or I’m bad for you,
Some things just don’t happen,
Girls like you don’t get guys like me,
And a guy like me can’t get a girl like you,
So I’ll stay as close to you as I possibly can,
Until the day I get me a girl like you



Thoughts

At a specific age we all stop growing,
But that’s physically,
Mentally and spiritually we will always develop,
I find myself believing things I never did before,
My likes and my interests,
They’ve changed,
Who I was then I no longer am today,
My mind is plagued with new epiphanies,
Like most women are shells,
Sure my natural instinct as a man is lured by their anatomy,
But I’m not intrigued by their minds,
Those seductive pictures don’t show me a wife,
They show me a toy,
Integrity and self respect are my ass and titties,
Sure I’m a sucker for nice hair,
But a woman I can learn from drives me insane,
As a boy I would chase around any of which who would show interest,
But as a man I’m harder to please,
Childhood friends becoming more distant,
As they no longer understand me,
They say I’ve changed,
But isn’t that what life is all about?
Growth?
We often try to relive old moments,
But I prefer to create new ones,
Hobbies are my new obsession,
And knowledge is something I want to collect,
Not a chain nor a new car,
But experiences,
I’ve learned to love life for life will be here as long as I am,
Sex ends when it ends,
Money goes when it’s spent,
And you can alway get more of them both,
But why chase things you’ve already had?
When there are things you still haven’t seen.



To have a love as endless as the ocean,
With limits as high as the sky,
Being able to touch you like the wind,
A passion similar to fire,
I like a woman of power,
To walk all over me like concrete,
But I’ll be a dominate man,
You won’t run when my volcano erupts,
To be my hummingbird,
For our flower to grow,
As I watch you blossom,
I shall plant our seed,
Tis a cycle that starts,
Tis a cycle that ends,
Nurture our secret garden,
And start over again.



S’aloiL

I thought natural beauty could only be grown,
Yet your roots contain no soil,
A soul connected,
Branch-less,
But your love helps me grow,
Your eyes bloom with every glance,
But you need light to blossom,
I would give you my seed,
In this field we call earth,
You’re my precious flower,
Many have tried to pick you,
But couldn’t nurture your breed,
I’m here to do those things,
Can I caress your stems?
I’ll ignore your every thorn,
For no flower is perfect,
I will tend to your every need,
Tho I’m no florist,
I’ll make mistakes at first,
But I’m willing to learn,
I don’t want to trim you,
I will never replant you,
As I will accept you the way I met you,
My precious flower,
I thought natural beauty could only be grown,
But when I met you,
You proved me wrong.



Don’t Grow Up

I fear for the women of the future,
As they degrade themselves for reasons unknown,
What business does a young teen have dressing so provocatively?
To attract boys?
Men are too old,
Why do you want to look like a woman yet still act like a girl?
They get sonograms before diplomas,
Insults before congratulations,
Their mothers won’t even claim them,
Showing their cleavage when they should be showing their mind,
We were all teens once,
And one thing we were blind to was prioritizing,
Girl crazy or boy crazy,
It’s all the same,
Cuz by today six years from now that boy you love will be just a name,
He’s cute,
All the girls like him,
Now you’re having his baby,
And he doesn’t like you anymore,
Was it worth it?
Would you rather do homework or change a diaper?
You can have style,
But don’t draw attention to yourself,
Men are pigs and boys are boys,
Make up is made up,
But inside you’re true,
Keep on being someone you’re not,
Soon you won’t know you,
Dreams will be dreams forever,
A day to yourself will be your biggest fantasy,
When all along you could’ve had the life you always longed for,
If you just acted your age,
Don’t grow up



The Best Reflection I’ve Ever Seen

I’ve never been jealous of another man in my life,
Except this one time,
I saw this guy holding this pretty woman’s hand,
But it was just my own reflection,
I always told myself I wanted to be me when I grow up,
Though I’ve been called many things,
One thing I’ve never been is a failure,
I’m a man whore?
I’ll be the biggest man whore of all time,
I’m too honest?
I’ll try harder to be even more honest,
I’m too sensitive?
I’ll dig deeper into my feelings,
I’m not good enough?
I’ll be a even worse in the morning,
I’m a perfectionist,
Even if my goal is to fuck up,
I’ll be the best at that shit,
Because I’m me,
And I don’t care if you like it or not,
No one can be a better me than I,
Yet I don’t want to be anyone but me,
I am the greatest me there ever was,
And ever will be



Bookmark’s

When we were in love,
We were in love,
But when I hated you,
I HATED you,
I meant everything I ever said,
Every noun,
Every verb,
For the most part,
You were my 9 to 5,
I guess I can say the work paid off,
Now I’m unemployed,
In the sense that I’m alone,
Random women call me for interviews,
And I never accept the position,
It’s usually just small talk,
Sex became a game that I’ve learned to play pretty well,
It’s almost too easy to find someone to play with,
Tho I miss that intense feeling,
It’s something I would’ve died for,
Now my only purpose is to live,
For me,
The poison is finally gone,
Yet I still wonder,
What if I never met you?
How long before I forget you?
And what if I did all the things I meant to?
It’s never too late,
But I rather close the book now,
While another one has my attention,
Bookmarks were made for a reason.



Voids

Voids get filled everyday out here,
You say you know,
But really you have no idea,
I think I lost my mind but only had one beer,
At least I’m in a better place than I was last year,
I mean we all have problems,
How’s yours different than mine?
He’s poor,
And this other guy just lost his wife,
I think I hear you,
That still doesn’t mean I’m not blind,
Saying free my nigga ain’t gon set your nigga free,
Eventho freedom is free freedom here don’t come so cheap,
Everything here got its price and it don’t come without no fee,
You say that you don’t got no job but we got jobs as human beings,
I used to spend all my nights cuffin,
But now I spend them drinkin,
Till she finds her way back up here and she’s staying for the weekend,
What you doing here this evening?
I don’t man I’m just thinking,
Even though it has no purpose you’re still out here for some reason,
Just a lost little boy stuck with being a man,
With no need to show the world so I don’t use my cam,
I leave my feelings abandoned,
Until someone finds them,
Life don’t have no map,
I use my lessons as guidance,
But I’m in love with this cup,
She always gives me the answers, let me buy you a drink,
This girl will always understand us,
You’re not an alcoholic bro you’re just unemployed,
If they ask you what you did tonight just say you filled your voids



Insomnia

It’s so different,
But it’s the same,
I can’t even say your name without complaining,
Don’t know who you with or where you at,
Not even where you staying,
But you’re doing what you’re supposed to,
It’s no thing,
I say I changed I see you’ve changed,
Now it’s a different game,
But we’d both be better off if we don’t even play it,
Trying to pretend like you don’t mean a thing,
Even though I don’t respond,
I’m still listening,
Girl I see you,
Girl I see you,
Feel like I don’t even know you and I’m tryna meet you,
Starting to realize that we both just have some common features,
But it can’t work if I’ll just be with who is in the mirror,
Even if I can see it clearer,
But there’s no view from here,
The pictures gone,
I think I’ll need a new frame to see it,
Its just insomnia



Let Me Buy You Flowers

I’ve been itching to do something I haven’t done in awhile,
Something short and sweet that can make you smile,
Do you like surprises?
Or the color of the sky when the sunrises?
The glare of a lit candle off a dinner plate,
That compliments the reflection of your lovely face,
The wine glass that stands between us brings us closer together,
I’m just trying to get to know you better,
Do you like the ocean?
The sounds of the beach?
Would you mind leaving tonight and coming back next week?
I’m trying to show you things that you would never believe,
Because the truth is a lie unless its a lie you seek,
I’m asking honest questions,
I want your naked answers,
Bare to anything that can despair us,
I don’t see a ring there,
Would you like one?
Maybe not from me,
But from someone?
Let’s get our passport’s the same day,
Leave the same time and go to the same place,
Can I see your curls in Mexico?
And your light complexion in Spain?
Go to Venice in a day,
And then kiss in the rain?
But it’s okay if we can’t right now,
If the world won’t allow us,
Just allow this one thing,
Let me buy you flowers.



Cherry Blossom

Let me walk beyond your garden,
Around the time it blooms,
Sometime between the April showers,
And the sun that burns in June,
Let me walk along your cherry,
Although it may be soon,
They asked what I think beauty is,
But I just think it’s you,
The nature of your bloom depicts the nature that is life,
Your stems of wisdom proceed my theories,
Without you there’s no light,
You’re beauty in it’s rarest form,
But not only once a year,
To see this Cherry walk without you,
Is the only thing I fear,
You’re the sound that swarms the skies,
And the wind that gusts my ears,
I would love to see your cherry blossom,
But not without you here



Don’t Just Stand There

A dream is just a warning,
Of things yet to come,
A road to a passage,
That isn’t easy to run,
Where mistakes can be your lessons,
And your lessons make you greater,
Where the now is the now,
And the now affects you later,
But if you stand still,
The passage shall close,
The road is unseen,
And the water has rose,
You’re drowning in a sea of troubles,
Watch your problems wash a shore,
While your answers are the sand,
Build a castle if you can,
A mansions on a land,
But land ain’t make it,
For it wouldn’t be there if man ain’t made it,
The hammer of life that hammers away,
Dozens of nails on a empty space,
That makes a mass density which was once green plains,
Replaces the lions den with a parking space,
The mind is a toolbox,
It doesn’t use itself,
But if the mind ain’t put to use it’ll lose itself,
Use those hands and feet to help you reach,
Don’t just stand there,
Live your dreams



Silly You

Ask me where them girls at,
I’ll tell you where my girl at,
Can never understand this funny silly way my girl acts,
Asking me some questions like I’m bout to start confessin’
But never catch me in the act,
So when are you gon learn your lesson?
I only have eyes for you,
But the only person who can’t see it is you,
Stevie Wonder made fun of your eye sight,
Would’ve never tried if i’d see this in hindsight,
Girl get your mind right,
You know that your mine right?
If i didn’t want you I won’t be wasting my time right?
Damn its a dumb fight,
Wasting these long nights,
But never can complain about the shit that i do right,
I swear that i’m tired of it,
Restless and tired fussin,
If only we would spend our time huggin instead of tusslin,
Shit would be better though,
It’ll be hard to let you go,
But on the real you need to get it together yo,
Like i already told you i only got eyes for you, 
And those other girls see that I got eyes too, 
But i ain’t lookin at em,
Bunch of pokemon but word to me i’ll never catch em’,
I got a small sense of humor i’m silly too,
And that’s the only way I can put up with silly you,